So, for all the people wondering "what are you up to? Wait are you still in grad school?" In November last year, I stepped back from my graduate program. Long story short, it just was not the right time. I realized there is a lot I want to figure out about myself and the best career path for me before committing to a graduate program I am not sure about.
One of the biggest challenges was realizing I have multiple passions and instead of wholeheartedly pursuing them all during my senior year of my undergraduate career, I picked only two (education and science journalism. Oh, Annenberg! The road not taken!) and chose to bide my time in graduate school. Instead of trying to work and applying for many different and difficult advocacy positions or trying Americorps, I chose to pretend to know what I wanted. I chose to leave the job search for next year.
Now, I realize there are quite a few tracks that I am not only qualified for but have unique insight towards. And that it is perfectly alright not to have a set linear career path. And there is always time for graduate school! Also, I am REALLY young and still have plenty of time to explore my options before settling into a career. I actually really enjoy the idea of starting at the bottom (cue Drake) and working my way up.
After all, the best biographies are not those that have things handed to them and go entirely smoothly, but those who fall and stumble, but get up stronger and stronger every time. We always find those people most interesting when they have faced challenges and risen to the occasion. Also, I realize if I never do go back to school, I will be joining a legion of Harvard "drop-outs" including Mark Zuckerberg and Bill Gates, and countless others. Not a bad place to be!
It is so funny to me that though I know I will never be a traditional scientist, the impulses to search, to discover still lay dormant within me. They remind me that I still need to feed my mind AND my soul. And that applying science to non-traditionally scientific fields is still something I can pursue.
So in the meantime, I am temping. Which means I do random office work, alphabetizing, etc. while still job searching and applying. Yesterday, my assignment got cancelled, and I was left in Longwood with no particular destination. The Longwood area for me conjures up memories of Summer 2011 when I was still set on a research career in Neuroscience.
When I step off the T there, immediately I remember the smell of my supervisor's homemade Chinese lunches and my visceral dread of checking on the mice. And the happy Starbucks on the corner in front of Children's Hospital and how getting a chocolate croissant at the Au Bon Pain at Children's humanized the research process for me by making me think, "Your research could save a child's life."
It also made me appreciate that opportunity I had. To take an unpaid research internship. To explore a passion and imagine my own future. It made me realize what a gift that those chances were for me and how, even if I am not pursuing them now, I always have that option.
From Longwood, I walked down Huntington and it reminded me of how much my life was run by music and the arts. Passing the New England Conservatory, being reminded of long Friday nights spent in those echo-y chambers playing flute in the Baroque Family Ensemble with my brother singing. These pieces of me I haven't really opened up in a good 8 years. I don't remember the last time I even picked up my flute.
Passing the Huntington Theater, I remember how much going to those shows in middle school made my week or month. How much my heart soars when I see good performance. How much I miss learning dance. Not just Bharatanatyam, but all styles. How for a few years, I defined myself as a performer, never dreaming of really pursuing science. And though I was not necessarily very talented, I pursued the arts with a fervor I seldom feel anymore. The only thing that compares are the times I have sung along to my iPod without a care at open-mics. That thrill of performance. That spark of confidence.
It's funny how just walking along, singing along the way, sharing secret smiles with those who walk my way can make my heart feel alive again. And how sharing my day makes me feel as though I'm not going it alone.
To everyone in their early 20's,
we're all in this together.
peace, love, sunshine. x
maithreyi
One of the biggest challenges was realizing I have multiple passions and instead of wholeheartedly pursuing them all during my senior year of my undergraduate career, I picked only two (education and science journalism. Oh, Annenberg! The road not taken!) and chose to bide my time in graduate school. Instead of trying to work and applying for many different and difficult advocacy positions or trying Americorps, I chose to pretend to know what I wanted. I chose to leave the job search for next year.
Now, I realize there are quite a few tracks that I am not only qualified for but have unique insight towards. And that it is perfectly alright not to have a set linear career path. And there is always time for graduate school! Also, I am REALLY young and still have plenty of time to explore my options before settling into a career. I actually really enjoy the idea of starting at the bottom (cue Drake) and working my way up.
After all, the best biographies are not those that have things handed to them and go entirely smoothly, but those who fall and stumble, but get up stronger and stronger every time. We always find those people most interesting when they have faced challenges and risen to the occasion. Also, I realize if I never do go back to school, I will be joining a legion of Harvard "drop-outs" including Mark Zuckerberg and Bill Gates, and countless others. Not a bad place to be!
It is so funny to me that though I know I will never be a traditional scientist, the impulses to search, to discover still lay dormant within me. They remind me that I still need to feed my mind AND my soul. And that applying science to non-traditionally scientific fields is still something I can pursue.
So in the meantime, I am temping. Which means I do random office work, alphabetizing, etc. while still job searching and applying. Yesterday, my assignment got cancelled, and I was left in Longwood with no particular destination. The Longwood area for me conjures up memories of Summer 2011 when I was still set on a research career in Neuroscience.
When I step off the T there, immediately I remember the smell of my supervisor's homemade Chinese lunches and my visceral dread of checking on the mice. And the happy Starbucks on the corner in front of Children's Hospital and how getting a chocolate croissant at the Au Bon Pain at Children's humanized the research process for me by making me think, "Your research could save a child's life."
It also made me appreciate that opportunity I had. To take an unpaid research internship. To explore a passion and imagine my own future. It made me realize what a gift that those chances were for me and how, even if I am not pursuing them now, I always have that option.
From Longwood, I walked down Huntington and it reminded me of how much my life was run by music and the arts. Passing the New England Conservatory, being reminded of long Friday nights spent in those echo-y chambers playing flute in the Baroque Family Ensemble with my brother singing. These pieces of me I haven't really opened up in a good 8 years. I don't remember the last time I even picked up my flute.
Passing the Huntington Theater, I remember how much going to those shows in middle school made my week or month. How much my heart soars when I see good performance. How much I miss learning dance. Not just Bharatanatyam, but all styles. How for a few years, I defined myself as a performer, never dreaming of really pursuing science. And though I was not necessarily very talented, I pursued the arts with a fervor I seldom feel anymore. The only thing that compares are the times I have sung along to my iPod without a care at open-mics. That thrill of performance. That spark of confidence.
It's funny how just walking along, singing along the way, sharing secret smiles with those who walk my way can make my heart feel alive again. And how sharing my day makes me feel as though I'm not going it alone.
To everyone in their early 20's,
we're all in this together.
peace, love, sunshine. x
maithreyi
Comments
Post a Comment